The Dynamic Trio - Blog

The winner of our mystery prize is….ESTELLA!

Send me an e-mail to tj@tjmichaels.com and I’ll tell you what your choices are! Congratulations, chicklet. Actually, it’s a choice of downloads or a goody bag, but with the mail the way it is this time of year we wanted to give you some choices :D

TJ

PS - You have one week (until 12-28-06) to claim your prize :D

And in honor of TT, I want to talk about sex in books. Or to be more specific, the things in sex scenes that drive me nuts and make me wonder if the person writing that scene has ever had sex.

1. The junk jamming hero. Okay, I know penises are wonderful things to have and have used on you. But they’re not wonderful to just have jammed into any old crevice without preparation. If I read an anal scene and the hero just thrusts in there without any prep (no stretching, no lube) it makes me want to sock him in the balls. Repeatedly.

2. The wailing heroine. It’s a general rule of mine that when I write sex the heroine can only scream or wail once during sex. When I read these women who wail and scream and cry out in every sex scene, it makes me snicker. Noise is sexy, screaming, crying, wailing, keening heroines in every sex scene? Not so much.

3. Sex scenes where I have to put the book down and try to position myself to imagine what the hell the couple is doing. Now this is something everyone does. I’ve done it. I think the problem is that the story is in your head so you know what it looks like but it doesn’t translate. That’s when editors come into play and mine have certainly said, “what the heck is her neck doing here?”

4. On the subject above, couples that kama sutra every time. Wheelbarrowing, sex swinging, upside down trapeze fucking, she’s got one leg wrapped around his neck while he’s hanging her off the side of a building and she’s singing the national anthem in French or somesuch. It doesn’t have to be in the dark, missionary or anything but if it’s so farcical that I shake my head, that’s not sexy. It’s confusing and over the top. Sexy isn’t about impossibility and wackiness of position, it’s about the connection of the characters.

5. Heroines that have hair trigger clits. Yes, some women come very easily, but the majority of women can’t come with only intercourse. They need a little help with clitoral stimulation. All these heroines who come the minute penis makes contact with vagina just aren’t realistic.

6. Authors who throw sex into every crevice of a novel with no real purpose. I like sex in books. I write sex in books. But sex is a device, like any other action. If it’s just tossed in every four pages, it becomes tedious and meaningless.

7. Authors who are clearly uncomfortable with writing sex but have added it because someone told them it was new/hot/now. It’s okay to close the door, that can be sexy too. Don’t write it if you hate it or feel uncomfortable with it. That includes writing genres you don’t like or feel uncomfortable with like MM and menages.

If an author is really feeling her characters and is into the book, you’re going to feel the heat. It doesn’t have to be a three way in a glass box suspended above Times Square. Show me the connection and I’ll see the heat. Even if all the author does is kiss and close the door.

I hop over to Mrs Giggles’ website now and then to check out her latest reviews. She does snark like no one else and is one of the original online snarkers. Each book is marked out of 100 and she doesn’t hold back. Well, today I see I’ve been giggled!

Check out the review for Dreams of the Oasis III here.

Once you’ve read that, I have a few questions for you: Do you visit review sites on a regular basis? If so, which one’s are your favorites? Does a good review make you check out the book?

And just so you know my answers - I check out review sites more than I used to, probably part of the reason is that I find reviews for my own books and those of my friends and part of it is curiosity. Sometimes it’s because I’m procrastinating! I like the reviews at Dear Author and JERR. Those are two that spring to mind at the moment, and yes, sometimes I’ll check out a book after reading a review. It doesn’t necessarily have to be a good review. I’ve checked out books that have two-star reviews as well as those receiving glowing ones.

Pressure - Pressure - Pressure…

It’s 11:00 a.m. here in Colorado and… I just woke up! Now it’s 11:45 and it’s taken me almost an hour to get this post up. First I’m frantic, then I stop and think, “Well, geez, it’s the first time in a LONG time I’ve slept this late, and also the first time in awhile where I’ve actually gotten more than eight hours of sleep. Yep, last night I got nine hours. And believe it or not, I’m still tired! ”

Fitness is very important to me, but because of my goofy schedule (work is nuts, writing is nuts, kids are nuts - macadamias, I think) I have not made time to go to the gym or work out like I normally would. And ya’ll, I’m really starting to feel it.

So I’m getting ready to start a new program with the hopes of becoming one of the few in my state certified to teach it. It’s a style of samurai sword training designed for people who don’t have a umpteenth degree black belt…like me. Do I have some martial arts training? Sure, but it’s been so long since I’ve done any of that stuff I don’t think I’m flexible enough to do a good round-house kick anymore.

I can lift weights and bodybuild ’til the cows come home, but don’t ask me to kick my leg higher than my shoulder! This particular program should give me back some flexibility while retaining the muscle I already have. I’m not going to recommend it until I see if it works for me or not. I’ll let you know how it goes…

So here’s my question …actually I lied, it’s more like two questions: What do you think about fitness? I’m sure everyone thinks it’s important and it clearly has medical benefits, but on the other hand, everything is not for everyone. So what do you enjoy or what would you like to try?

Second question: I just love good looking men (I know that’s not a question, but I’m getting there :D). I love men with all shades of skin and hair color, BUT WHAT I REALLY LOVE to look at are gorgeous, muscular, golden skinned men. I don’t care if they had to tan to look that way, or they have naturally tan skin, like Native American’s (of which I am part Lakota and Blackfeet), or Japanese, or Middle Eastern. Heck, even Siberian men are naturally tan. Cold (bbrrrrr) but naturally tan (*wink*).

What wets your whistle? I mean literally makes you want to whistle out loud when you see it? You don’t necessarily have to have it, but you sure like to look at it! This is Eric Schweig - Last of the Mohicans, Alessandro Juliani - Battlestar Gallactica, and Jason Scott Lee…uh, lots of movies, including playing Bruce Lee in The Dragon.

I’m trying to think of a contest to go along with this, but coffee is required. Go ahead and participate and your name will go into the hat for a mystery prize (mmwwaahahaha).

TJ *off to find a cup of something brown with caffeine in it*

I was IMing with a friend this week and the subject of pressure came up. The pressure we put on ourselves so that it’s never enough.

I was saying that I look at multiple book deals like hers and I feel like my novella sale isn’t good enough when measured against that. I see that kind of success in people whose work I adore, friends who I’ve seen work hard and struggle and I don’t resent it or begrudge it, I celebrate that. But I also feel this pressure to measure myself against it and then I find myself lacking.

Funny, she said she looked at how fast I worked and felt like she wasn’t measuring up. (and hello, her writing is outrageously good)

It’s odd to me how hard we can be on ourselves. The pressure to produce and keep out there comes from a good place - readers who want more and publishers who want more. These are good things! But at the same time, it creates pressure.

Most of the time, I find myself in a groove. I work every day. It’s okay, that’s who I am. I’m not vain when I say I work damned hard. I do. I give up sleep to do this but I love it and I’m blessed to be able to live my dream. Anyway, I have my groove and I work on multiple projects and keep moving forward. If I do this, I usually have projects at different places in the chain of release so I can break up my schedule with edits, revisions, writing manuscripts of a few different genres. It keeps things interesting for me and usually I don’t have time for the doubts and the stress.

But every once in a while if things get quiet for five minutes I start to feel the stress of it all. Wondering if I’ll ever make another NY sale. Wondering if the next time I try to write I’ll end up dry.

I read Alison Kent’s blog earlier this week and saw her talking about producing as well - as in the time we spend on our books and not having the time we need because of the need to get more books out there in a year.

Generally, I feel like I give the time to get the backstory right. Too much time sometimes when I obsess about small details (maps are my obsession). It would be nice to put out a book a year so I could spend more time on the obsessive details and not have the pressure to produce more. But you know, I put out nine books in 2007, wrote five of those in the calendar year and another five, a novella, and two partials. That’s damned productive and I think they’re all fine books with good plotting, story and writing. But I still feel like I haven’t done enough and I wonder if it’s just a matter of personality or what.

This sort of touches on something Jordan said at her blog about goals. I keep a list of goals but I try to be general. I used to be very specific but found that I got all bogged down in the details when it’s not the details of title and which story, but the follow through with the overall goals of writing and completing projects, editing, seeking new markets, etc.

So why don’t we give ourselves a break? Maybe people do. Maybe I’m the only one who feels like if if I don’t do it NOW, I’ll never do it. I’ll fail or not measure up, or one of a dozen other things that plagues your sanity and turns a confident person into a mass of insecurity at least for a few days each month.

I needed to find my cellphone the other day. I needed it RIGHT now, but do you think I could find the pesky thing? I juggled my Christmas shopping and searched one-handed while standing in the middle of a busy street, muttering under my breath. It was definitely time for a clean out!!

When I took everything out of my bag this is what I found:

1 x wallet
1 x plastic folder containing lotto tickets
2 x glasses cases - sunglasses plus driving glasses
1 x envelope containing signed bookmarks
1 x small makeup bag containing mostly lipsticks
1 x packet of tissues
1 x business card holder - it’s new and I’m still practicing opening it so my cards don’t fly out in a whoosh.
1 x PDA - contains ebooks
7 x pens
3 x raffle tickets from Romance writer’s meeting
1 x old grocery shopping list
1 x Tictac mints
1 x Lush lip balm
3 x flashdrives containing backups
1 x Susan Elizabeth Phillips promo notepad
1 x chocolate fortune, which says “A conversation will reveal a secret.”
1 x cellphone FINALLY!

And do you know what? After considering all the above, I decided every single thing was necessary and I put the whole lot back apart from the old shopping list and raffle tickets!!

Is your handbag in the same sad state as mine?

Shelley

The winner of their choice of downloads from any of the Dynamic Trio authors is…

Shuck Ying!

Just email me with your title choice and format and I’ll send it your way.

She GOT Me!

I’ve been tagged! Fabulous author, Kate Davies, tagged me to answer a question that will probably take me twenty years! Why? Because the subject of the ‘tag’ is: Six Strange Things About You.’ Geez, I could name at least four hundred and thirty two thousand six hundred and fifty two things!

And since Kate tagged me, I’m gonna tag somebody else – Mwwahahaha! More fun for everyone! Soooo… I’ve tagged Cerridwen Press author, Lise Fuller!

So, here’s my Six Things:

1) I’m addicted to cinnamon. Not just any old cinnamon, only the best – Saigon fine ground cinnamon. I eat it with everything. I dip apples, pears and any kind of fruit in it. I dip cookies, cinnamon rolls and chocolate in it. Sometimes I put it in a little cup and just eat it! I love cinnamon! Uh-hem, excuse me, Saigon fine ground cinnamon.

2) I’m addicted to my eBook reader. I have an eBookwise reader that I take everywhere. And I mean everywhere. I have boxes and boxes of print books, but have to admit I haven’t picked up a print novel in ages. If I can’t get it onto my little toy I tend to procrastinate on buying it. I do get around to it, but I buy eBooks faster than print…then take the books to the bathroom at work, the bathroom at home, on the treadmill at the gym. Heck, even when I got to pick up my kids from somewhere, if I have to wait more than sixty seconds for them, I pull out the eBookwise.

3) I wash my face in the bathtub before I get in the shower. Who the heck knows why, but I stand on the side of the tub, feet firmly planted on the carpet, lean over and wash my face. Then I climb in the shower and wash the rest of me. I know…I need help.

4) I rub my feet together before I get in bed. I know, I know, my ex-husband thought I was weird too. Then one day he started doing it! It’s just that after walking about the house barefoot the thought of getting in bed with little dusties on my feet grosses me out!

5) I’m a hell of a cook but I won’t touch raw meat. I can cook anything and make it taste good. But if there’s meat in it, I call my daughter into the kitchen and have her wash it for me and put it in a bowl. Then I take a fork or whatever and handle it that way. Something about the feel of chicken skin on my fingers. Ewwww!

6) I love coffee but it takes me all day to finish a single cup. Serious, I’ll buy a cup of coffee in the morning and sip, sip, sip it. When two o’clock rolls around, I’m still sipping the same cup. Can we say ‘wrong’ boys and girls?

Man, kids.

This morning, my daugher has been running around alternately demanding I brush pony hair (My Little Pony is huge at my house, lemme tell you, I brush a lot of pony hair) and taking her shirt off and refusing to put it back on. It’s like a girls gone wild video. Ok, well without creepy men with video cameras and stupid 19 year old drunk girls whose mothers are so going to kick their butts.

Anyway, I had a great discussion about Chased with one of my beta readers who helped me immensely! I knew there were some pacing problems in the middle and so I bounced ideas off her and I think I may have two scenes to fix and it should help the flow a lot.

The time approached where I had to leave to pick up my middle kiddo from preschool so I had to chase the wee monster down, let her hold the pony when I shoved her shirt back on (around her complaints about the 3/4 sleeves) and she refused to wear tennis shoes and only would wear her “princess shoes” which are little black satin dress shoes. But whatever. The person who coined the “pick your battles” phrase had a two year old and so we took off. In the car, she pulled her hair out of the cute little pony tail, sigh, and then whined that her hair was down.

At school, I approached the playground and his teacher gave me the look. Yep. Again. I’ve talked about the look before and maybe other people have kids so well behaved they’ve never gotten the look as they approached a teacher before.

So his teacher, who is a truly lovely woman who loves kids, tells me that my 5 year old was in circle and said, “Blah, blah, blah” when she started her lesson plan. Damn Fairly Oddparents! Oh, and he pushed a kid and in general, was a nasty brat. He wasn’t so spectatular yesterday either. So he’s running around the playground and we’ve got to go and the 2 year old who is in my arms because she’s wearing princess shoes with no socks and she gets wet wood chips in them and whines and so forth, is struggling to get down and I’m trying to be postive parent but I’m about two seconds from that yell, “GET YOUR BUTT OVER HERE!” which I’m sure no other mother ever makes but me which is probably why he’s talking back to his teacher in Montessori for goodness sake. How can you talk back in Montessori? It’s freaking Montessori where math is fun. Jeebus.

Anyway, I finally get him to come without having to resort to yelling and he’s attitudinal in the car and the wee babe is kicking the back of my seat and we have no chocolate.

I had the talk with him about respect and he’s on quiet time now. I think he’s actually coming down with something but 5 was this crappy with my oldest too. I’m done with pissy stages, thankyouverymuch. The wee monster is down with a nap and I have three minutes of quiet. But as I gained two pounds last week (uh, which is why we don’t have chocolate) I ate some rice, which was actually quite tasty and I’m staring blearily at the screen now as I wish I could take a nap, LOL.

I am however, nearly done with my Christmas shopping!

I’ll start my post off with some good news - remember a while ago when you helped me dress my heroine? Well, I heard yesterday that Ellora’s Cave are buying Sarah’s story. It was a great birthday present. Watch this space for more news of SEX, SPIES AND SAPPHIRES!

I decided to pick an extra winner since I’m having such a great month. And the winners are:

Denise
Liz
Lisa T

Your prize is a download of one of the following:

Live the Moment (contemporary)
Wild Child (contemporary)
Curse of Brandon Lupinus (shapeshifter)
Stray Cat Strut (gay/shapeshifter)

email me at shelley munro @ gmail. com (no spaces) with your choice of download plus format. For Live the Moment and Wild Child I only have PDF and HTML formats.

Oh, and I forgot to say. I’m a Selkie shifter, much to my disgust. I much prefer cats!